Whomp Power

I always get shit for reading it, but I only read the "celebrity-ask-a-question" on the first page, I swear. This week there was a question posed about international adoption:

Q: Why do stars like Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie adopt foreign kids when many are waiting here?

Parade’s answer was: In Hollywood, it's fashionable to adopt infants from the Third World. "Also, many believe there's less red tape outside the U.S. Often it's worse," explains actor Henry Winkler. He works with the Children's Action Network, which says 119,000 foster-care kids in the US are eligible for adoption.

The folks at the Research-China blog have taken them to task, with a great breakdown on numbers of adoptions domestically. But this paragraph, I think, answers it just fine: "I guess the point that bothers me most about the question asked by the reader of Parade Magazine is that it is almost always posed by those who have not adopted at all. Instead of impugning the characters of the Meg Ryans and Angelina Jolies of the world, why don’t these same people simply adopt a child from the foster care program? Calling their adoption "fashionable" demeans the great thing they, or anyone adopting a child, has done. I guess I would respond to those that ask this question, “Unless you have adopted an orphaned child from anywhere in the world, either here in the U.S. or overseas, keep your cynical questions and comments to yourself!”"

No, not the Captain Tractor album, though I highly recommend it. The McMenamin Empire is looking to buy the Multnomah County Correctional Facility in Troutdale, aka The Farm. Those of you familiar with the Edgefield will remember the jail that sits just up and behind it. If they do buy it, expect to be able to spend the night in a cell.

Like most other McMenamin establishments, there will probably be numerous bars. An expansion of the Edgefield Challenge sounds like it will soon be in order. Perhaps if you lose, you spend the night in the hole?

Per Dictionary.com:

compassion

n 1: a deep awareness of and sympathy for another's suffering [syn: compassionateness] 2: the humane quality of understanding the suffering of others and wanting to do something about it

Signals is selling this bracelet with the word "Compassion" stamped on sterling silver, which is attached to a leather bracelet.

< scratches head in puzzlement >

Perhaps the cow was suffering and someone really wanted to do something about it, so they turned it into a bracelet.

Canada. Beer. Can't think of one without the other, really. Bob and Doug, the archtypal Hosers in Strange Brew ("This movie was shot in 3-B, three-beers, and it looks good, eh?"). Check out what "beer is bigger than..." in the Great White North. Thanks to Steven Page, I discovered that Rick Mercer has a blog. This Hour Has 22 Minutes was one of the single greatest reasons to have a big ugly dish in the backyard... before CBC got all snotty and went digital on us.

At any rate, Rick Mercer has a blog post about the current beer climate in Canada.
"Remember: children may be our greatest resource but beer is our greatest beverage. And besides if it wasn’t for beer most of these kids wouldn’t have been born anyway." He has even gone so far as to have a petition: Beer Not Kids.

If this post has heightened your interest in Canadian Beer, I suggest you take a look at Real Beer's Canadian Beer Index, or Beer Advocate's Canadian Beer Forum. I think I'll move my (empty) can of Molson Canadian to a more prominent place on my shelf of favorite things. From far and wide, O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

Friday was Owen's birthday, and we had a little party with family on saturday. I was afraid the party would lack that party feel, so I drew up a Pin the Tail on the Donkey Game. After I drew my donkey, D said "we need an X for where the tail goes so we know who is closest". So I drew an X (not seen in the picture). It looked remarkably sphincter-like, and Owen said something like "I can see his poop hole!"


We told O that it wasn't his poop hole, but the place to aim to put the tail. So, he drew a poop hole for us.


Only after the party was over did Derek remember that maybe the donkeys of our childhood didn't stand with their bums facing you, but sideways. A quick search on google revealed that to be true. Oops.

The trailer can be viewed here. More info here. I find all this very exciting. I am indeed a fan of dick and fart jokes.

Judging by the 6 stores I've been to in the Portland area in the last week, there is absolutely no demand for rain coats for kids. Gigantic poofy snow jackets for that trip to Siberia - yes. Average lightweight waterproof jacket with a hood - not a chance in hell. Mindboggling.

Fun lego pics - including Adam Ant, The White Stripes, Fatboy Slim, and Pulp Fiction.

I decided to check out Photostamp, so I could make bitchin' stamps with my dog or O or whatever. But unless I'm an idiot, it appears that a sheet of 20 stamps costs $17.99. That is $10.19 more than a regular sheet would cost. Um, yeah.

This guy decided to join the Habs during practice, even though he isn't a member of the team. Good thing Theodore was up to the task.
"The man had spent most of the practice sitting in the seats in hockey gear. Winger Alex Kovalev wondered if he was a player waiting to go on after the Canadiens practice. Then the man moved down next to the boards, tightened his skate laces and jumped on the ice."

So O's preschool has a little clipboard where teachers and parent helpers can jot down funny things the kids say.
After school today a teacher asked me, in all seriousness, "did you tell Owen the story of baby Jesus and the manger at Christmas?" After a couple of "uh, ah, er" I said no, thinking "why would I?" and then "oh yeah, some people equate Jesus with Christmas". She then pointed out to me what was jotted on the clipboard:

Owen playing with felt story board: "Look, the baby is sleeping in the chicken nest!"

By Joss Whedon. Short guest column that is high on teh funny. Trust me! For I am a t.v. nerd.

I'm glad to know dear O isn't the only one in this predicament... it certainly added an element of fear to potty learning.

Owen got a Little Tikes T-Ball Set for Christmas. He also got walking pneumonia, but that is another story... Anyway, some of the instructions on the T-Ball Set are quite funny. For example:
-- Never place T-ball set on a hard surface such as concrete, asphalt, wood or other hard surfaces.
-- Never place or use T-ball set in or near street, driveways, sidewalks, alleys, patios, hills or garage.
-- Never place or use T-ball set near playground equipment, trees, low branches, wires, clothesline, fences, pools and parked cars.
-- Never hit ball at other children, people, animals or moving bicycles.
-- Do not use product when raining or when ground is wet.
If anyone can point out when and where I might be able to use this set without voiding the warranty, please let me know. Don't worry about stationary bicycles... The set has been great, despite our use of it near fences, wet grass, trees and low hanging branches, a hill, animals, and a pool. Owen was getting so frustrated and thought he was a terrible batter, when it was really the fault of mommy the terrible pitcher.

So what is with the Rose Parade being on January 2nd? Don't they realize that people only watch it because they are in a hungover sleep deprived stupor? Having it on Jan. 2nd is like getting your Christmas tree on December 26th. Apparently they have a "Never on Sunday" policy... here is the reasoning behind this tradition: The Tournament of Roses is a tradition full of traditions, one of which is our "Never on Sunday" policy. In 1893, officials decided to move the parade to Monday, January 2 to avoid frightening horses tethered outside local churches and thus interfering with worship services. As a result of this reverent gesture, speculation abounds as to the rare instances of rainfall on New Year's Day (only nine times in Rose Parade history), prompting some to ask the Tournament about its special pact with a "friend upstairs." Also as a result of this tradition, other collegiate bowl organizations have instituted similar procedures. The upcoming Rose Parade is on Monday, January 2, 2006 in observance of the Never on Sunday tradition.
Ok, so they made the policy in 1893 and have never thought that it might be getting outdated? "Reverent gesture" my ass. And they change the Bowl games? They play all other sports events on sundays, even on Christmas, Christ and Sunday be damned!! So why is the Rose Bowl on Wednesday the 4th? The whole thing is just so mental.
We also wondered why the heck Stephanie Edwards was not with Bob Eubanks in the booth announcing the parade, but rather under an umbrella down on the street. She had this to say "She also stated, as noted above, that while Bob Eubanks has a multi-year contract to host the Rose Parade, she does not. She stated that while she has felt in the past that her position as co-host was tenuous, she feels fairly sure this year that she will not be returning. " She seemed a bit odd in her reporting this year, at one point was chatting away and you couldn't hear her, until she reminded herself to speak into the microphone. Maybe she had been hitting the sauce to keep warm...